Wednesday, June 30, 2010

The Pitter-Patter Of Little Feet...

For the last few weeks, it seem the stork has been ever present... touching my friends' lives. In the last 4 weeks, there have been.. we're pregnant annoucements, we're having... annoucements, and our little one has arrived annoucements. Not to mention the never ending facebook statuses.. The last weeks of pregnancy are so difficult..., And when will this baby arrive?! Etc... Kinds of comments. It seems that Mr. Stork has been in overdrive bringing special deliveries to all my friends.

But truthfully, with all of the special deliveries that seem to be arriving lately, I can't help but raise my eyebrow a bit..

Take my friend who since her wedding in 2007 has given birth 3 times. Her first arriving shortly after our wedding in 2008, the second arriving shortly after the Monkey arrived, last year, and the newest addition, who arrived on Friday. What is so very mind boggling to me, is why they were in such a hurry. Granted, there is a significant age difference between she and her husband, he is a couple years older than I am, and she is in her late 20s. Still, I don't understand why she would push herself to have so many little ones, back to back to back like this. Especially considering that she has had significant complications during each pregnancy, and C-sections for each one.

What's even more comical have been her statuses on Facebook through out this most recent pregnancy. Particularly when it comes to the last few weeks prior to delivery, which by the way occurred 6 weeks before this newest one was due. Things, like how hard the last weeks of pregnancy are, and how she can't stand being so uncomfortable, and how the baby was being evicted..(that one was the last pregnancy related status posted, surprisingly the night before she went into labor.) And now, she is dealing with medical issues with this newest baby, because he wasn't ready to make his appearance into the world, and I just can't help but wonder when she lost her common sense.

She knows where babies come from after all.. She knows she has difficulties with her pregnancies, and that she is a C-section canidate. She knows how challenging having one newborn in the home is, let alone multiple children under the age of 3. Dare I mention the fact that she's also in the medical care profession, so has more than just the average person's knowledge on how major surgery impacts the body, not to mention how the complications she has experienced during each pregnancy is magnified moreso by things like excessive weight. Lord bless her, but she was not a petite girl to begin with, and with each pregnancy she has admittedly added more weight, which she has been very honest in disclosing to me that she has not lost. Yet, she and her hubby seem in such a hurry to add more children to their family.. they now have 4 children in the home.. 3 of them all having arrived during their last 3 years of marriage. I am starting to wonder if she and her hubby are thinking of giving the Duggars a run for their money.

Then there is another friend of mine, who should be delivering her son any day now. She like me, has a bit of an age difference between her two children. Her oldest son is 6 or so. This newest one came as a bit of surprise and she and the baby's father decided to get married several months into her pregnancy. Now, she is excitedly waiting for the arrival of her new baby.. and while I am happy for her, part of me wonders what the heck is going on in her mind too.

Given the fact that she gave custody of her first son up to her Ex-husband, because after she got divorced, she decided she didn't want to have any responsibilities. She has been in the Navy for for nearly all of her her first son's life, and because of that, she has not even lived in the same state as her oldest son for quite some time. Though now that she is out of the Navy, a recent development within the last year or so, she has decided to lay down roots at her very last duty station, which was the same very rock that the Sailor and I came from earlier this year. Which means, she obviously won't be taking road trips on a regular basis to visit with her older son. Though, she is posting the weekly belly shot of this progressing pregnancy, and answering other friends comments about how lucky and blessed she is to be expecting her new son, and how her husband and she are so thrilled and can't wait for his arrival.

Yet, in the years I have known her, she has almost never mentioned her older son, not directly or in her public profile on FB.. and I can't help but wonder if her enthusiasm for her new baby is based on the relationship she is currently in with said baby's dad?? And I can't help but wonder what kind of a mother allows her relationship or interaction with her child be determined by if she is in a significant relationship with the child's father. Why is one child then deemed more special or more important than the other?? Sadly, I know this is behavior that happens on more than a regular basis. I have seen it happen with several friends I have known since high school, particularly the couple who became teen moms. Some how, one way or another, their oldest child has wound up up with the biological fathers, and these women have gone on to marry later on down the road and establishing families with their husbands, whom they celebrate and brag about on a regular basis, but their first child is rarely discussed, or even recoqnized. I don't believe that all of them in every case have such an ill fated relationship with their first borns as to warrant little to no contact with them. So I can't help but wonder why all of their children aren't loved the same??

And now, because my insomnia has finally worn off.. I am off to bed...

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